marriage Archives - SuperMom Decoded

I think it’s nearly impossible for anyone in my house to surprise me, but my hubby, Merlon Devine, managed to do it effortlessly. After we ate dinner on my birthday (July 1), we reluctantly (so I thought) decided to order a dessert to share. The waiter came out with two plates, and placed the dessert assortment plate in front of me. On it there were three pink ribbons, and each was tying a piece of paper with a word (past, present, future) to a diamond band or ring!

The stereo speaker above our table was playing Merlon’s song he wrote to me, “Let’s Grow Old” from his new CD, Love Divine (you can get it at www.merlondevine.com).

Then he presented me with the ring set and asked me to renew our marriage vows for our 20 year anniversary in January. I had NO IDEA about any of it!!! I was blown away…in fact, I still am. What a wonderful surprise. He put a ring on it again!

I am crazy excited about this new ring! My very first wedding ring was quite modest. My husband purchased it from a pawn shop over twenty years ago. It was nice, and I am glad he was smart enough not to go in debt to buy me an expensive ring. I wore it proudly for ten years before getting my first ring upgrade.

I want to encourage you ladies reading this, not to base the quality of your marriage on the quality of your ring. Carats don’t equal a great marriage! How many celebrities have you seen that had a huge engagement ring and an expensive wedding, only to have a marriage that lasted a few months? Obviously it’s not all about the ring, the dress, the cake, etc.

My husband and I already knew we wanted to build our marriage on a solid foundation, Christ. We wanted the word of God to be the foundation for how we treated each other. We have allowed it to be the standard in our marriage. While our marriage has still required work, as all marriages do, it has been a wonderful 19 years so far! Our Christian beliefs have made all the difference in our relationship. Yeah, I know a few non-Christian people that seem to have a good relationship from the outside. I also know some devout Christians that were not able to stay married for various reasons. I am not condemning either of the relationships I just described. I can only tell you what we have decided, and what has worked for us. Again, being a Christian isn’t all there is to having a great marriage. You have to have two people that are committed to do the work to maintain the union. Here are a few things that have helped us stay the course:

We listen to teachings on marriage and apply them to our lives (I highly recommend Marriage Made EZ teachings by Drs. Mike and Deedee Freeman. They keep it REAL and practical.)
We attend marriage related events on a regular basis.
We talk to each other frequently (like two teenagers in love).
We communicate our issues and come to a resolution (easier said than done, but doable and so worth it).
We read books about marriage.
We go on dates often, during the daytime or nighttime.
We laugh together often.
We show affection to one another privately and publicly.
We attend church together and discuss what we learned from the service.

Here’s something from Pintrest that I thought would be good to share as well.

I could go on and on, but I think you get what I am saying. There is work involved in maintaining the marriage, just as there is in maintaining anything.

Thanks for taking the time to read this blog. I pray it has been a blessing to you in some way or another. I always love to hear from you, so leave your comments on this blog please! 🙂

I recently spent all day on various airplanes flying from Washington, DC to Cleveland, OH, to Detroit, MI, and then back to Washington, DC. Why? Well my husband discovered that I was just a few trips shy of reaching my next air miles status level (which has to be reached before this year ends). Since he has already been on this particular air mile status level for a while, we receive a lot of flying benefits just on his status alone. But he realized that if we are both individually on the same premier air miles status, together our benefits would increase tremendously.

My husband Merlon and I In ATL airport

We can travel easier, get a much better chance of 1st class upgrades on every trip, and much more. I admit, I was NOT really up for a solo trip “around the world” yesterday, but I do understand this– Being on the same level as the person you are traveling this life’s journey with makes the trip so much more beneficial. You can get to your destination easier, advance quicker, and benefit from God’s blessings so much more. No wonder that Bible teaches us about not being unequally yoked and the importance of unity and agreement. Be mindful of who you choose to travel life’s journey with. It makes all the difference in the world!