PREP(aration) SCHOOL – Getting You and Your Kids Out the House On Time

Frustration and tension you could cut with a knife…..These were not feelings of a woman that had just found out some heart wrenching news.

Oh no. This was ME getting my two beautiful little girls ready for church every Sunday morning– alone.
My husband would leave early to play in the band at church, and I was left to myself to find tights, dresses, bows, shoes, and all the other things little girls wore. (Insert sympathy here). Oh and somewhere along the way I was supposed to get myself together and show up at church on time, looking fabulous, feeling refreshed, and ready to worship! This was NOT my reality however. While I hoped and wished it would all work out, every distraction imaginable would come up. The tights I thought they would wear had a huge hole right in the knee area. The hair bow that matched the dress would be missing in action. I would manage to locate the right foot dress shoe, but what happened to the mate of that dress shoe when I needed it most? The ticking away of my precious time made it more and more apparent that my desired departure time was NOT going to happen. The tension would mount as I came to the harsh realization that I would be late…..again. Arriving late to church also meant there would be no space left in the nursery for my kids, and no seat left in the sanctuary. I felt defeated before I even left my home. Oh happy day……

During one of these Sunday morning drama filled episodes, I threw myself a pity party and invited the Lord to join me. I needed Him to tell me why this was so difficult for poor me to get to church on time. With tear filled eyes, I heard Him speak this within me clearly, “YOU are in control of your time.” What???? Did I misunderstand something here God? How is it that I am in control of my time when all these unexpected situations keep getting thrown at me? I mean, I AM THE VICTIM HERE, right? He said, “Everyone gets the same 24 hours.“ Finally, I got it.

You see, I felt like nobody had circumstances quite like MINE. I thought my available time was shorter than everyone else’s. I started to believe I was the only person in the world who had the horrible plight of getting two kids ready for church alone. Those, my friends, are the thoughts of a VICTIM, and a VICTIM never gets VICTORY, only SYMPATHY.

Once I recognized that dark evil forces were not congregating together every Saturday night to plan my Sunday morning demise, I saw who and what the REAL problem was. It and she could be found in my mirror. It was ME. Understand this–the mother of ten kids, the surgeon that spends 14 hours in the operating room, the pastor of a mega-church, the single mother that works full-time while working on her college degree, the elementary school teacher with the overcrowded class, the single father of a special needs child, the business owner, and I were all on a level playing field when it came to TIME. Each of us were dealt the same 24 hours to make it happen, regardless of our circumstances. Suddenly the tears dried up, the tension left, and I went from being powerless to powerful in an instant. Now all I needed was a STRATEGY. After I accepted the responsibility over my use of time, it was instantly clear what I had been doing wrong. I had not PREPARED. I was getting up every Sunday morning rolling the dice, hoping and wishing I would win, instead of planning to win. A WISH is NOT a PLAN. There is a great saying that says, “If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.” Use the following tips to make your plan and WIN:

 

1) PREParation– Decide the night before EXACTLY what you and your kids will wear, and then do a dress rehearsal to identify any issues. Are the tights free of holes and do they still fit? Do their clothes have any missing buttons, stains that were not removed during the washing process, etc.? Inspect everything and address any issues. Once each piece passes inspection, put it all together on a hanger. Place smaller items such as jewelry, hair bows, socks, bow tie, etc. in a small bag, and place it on the neck of the hanger. This may not seem like a big thing, but it is. It is those little details we overlook that snowball and eat away at our time.

2) Plan– Write the vision. Write out a schedule and allot a certain amount of time to it. A written plan increases the chances of it being an accomplished plan. If your kids can read, give them a copy. Both time and money must be given a specific assignment upfront, or they will aimlessly wonder everywhere, accomplishing nothing. Write each task that needs to be accomplished and delegate a frame of time to it. What time will you be in the shower? How long? What time will you comb their hair, feed them breakfast? How long will each task take? How long does it take for you to get ready? Is it better to do that before you wake your kids up or after? Be very specific and don’t leave out even the smallest of details.

3) Delegation– What are you doing for your kids that your kids could do be doing on their own? (We will discuss this more in a later blog). Is there anything you can delegate out? Can you put premeasured cups of milk in the refrigerator and covered bowls of cereal on the table and let them take it from there? Can they dress themselves? Make their own bed? Can the older child help the younger child with some things? Sometimes we think we have to do it all, when we don’t really have to.

4) Organization– This is a blog subject within itself! Elimination and organization will make all the difference. Organization involves creating a systematic place to put things, and a systematic way of doing things. Why didn’t I make this step #1? I did not make it step #1 because getting organized is a project that can take time. You can make a lot of progress by doing steps 1 & 2, even though things are not quite organized yet. Designate time to get everything in order. You won’t regret it!

5) Celebration– You finally got it right so celebrate, and get the kids in on it! Create a special little dance, handshake, or facial expression with your kids when you all accomplish a goal. That celebration will create a special memory between you and your kids. Celebration creates motivation. Motivation helps create repeat performance!

SUPERmom Tip: Super moms don’t have to be stressed out moms. Eliminate the stress, strain, and frustration that come as a result of improper planning. Creating a winning plan will help you enjoy the life you deserve with your family!

Do you plan to implement any of these steps? Do you currently implement any of these steps? If so, how is it working for you? I would love to hear back from you!

Signature

Comments

  1. OMG! You sound just like I also felt when my boys were small and sometimes I still have moments of this….ALOT OF ISSUES and NO TIME! Why? Because I fail to plan it out. Time is one of the most important things we have control over or not during our day but thats the thing…its up to us. I have been the mom working full time trying to finish two degrees..I have been the mom waking my boys up in the morning to go to school and they lay there and Im frustrated. At times I still struggle with time management but once I just stop everything and start over with focus and precision…things get better! Thanks for this advice. I am a empty nester sooo there is 1 out and I am working on the last one…We are currently working on the celebration dance but this kid thinks he is too cool to dance!!! Too funny! I love blogs! What a place to relate to others experiences and share our own…Good work! Keep it up!

    • @Niicole Thank you so much. I enjoy reading your comment! I think we have all felt that frustration! It’s great to come together in this type forum and create a winning strategy for eliminating that frustration. It’s easier to enjoy your kids when you aren’t MAD! 😉

  2. Oh. My. Goodness. If I EVER needed to read a blog post, I needed to read this one. Thank you SO much. I am a wife and mother of a 9 month old baby and my husband & I are on the worship team at church. (He’s the drummer and I am one of the worship leaders). We always seem to be scrambling around like crazy before service. I’ve always known to prepare the night before, but rarely seem to actually do it. This post really breaks it down and is so relatable to my current daily lifestyle. I’m looking forward to implementing the outfits the night before with accessories in a small ziplock bag on the hanger, writing out a written plan and preparing breakfast as much as I can the night before. I cannot begin to tell you how much I needed this post. Not just for Sundays, but for everyday. Organization is not one of my strengths but your simple instructions really help make these goals attainable. I believe that the things that you’ve mentioned in this post will be implemented in my family for years to come. Thank you, thank you, thank you!! 🙂

    • @Beautymarkedmom I am thrilled this has helped you!!! Thank you for your comment. Motherhood goes by too quickly. We can’t waste time on frustration. Usually our struggles are other people’s struggles. So glad mine has helped you! Thanks again!

  3. Great post with great information! I definitely can identify with you in regards to this area. I have two boys (infant & toddler) and a husband in ministry and I have come to realize that preparation the night before service is essential. Not only is it essential for being on time but also for me to have peace and sanity in the process. Thanks for sharing. I definitely will be putting the information into practice.

    • LaTwana Thank you so much for reading it and for sharing your story here. You are so right, there is no peace & sanity without order! Again, thanks for taking the time to comment. It means a lot to me!

  4. Lynn Boatner says:

    God bless you Rocquelle! This may be your first comment but I’m excited to share on your blog. You laid it out didn’t you girl? We all have been there.done that..bought the t-shirt and had the garage sale too (lol) when it comes to being “Super Mom”. When we know better we do better because Preparation time is Never lost time. I have implemented these steps and have a few in motion now. I always told my family that we are all team players on the home front and “Team work makes the dream work”!

    This is real talk with a real plan to get real results in real time in a real way! Love it! We have a beautiful and responsible 17 year old at home and I have learned to PREP! P-Pray 1st. R-Rejoice. E-Enjoy these moments. P-Plant more seeds. I pray you will touch the lives and hearts of women globally even if its just in a small way. God knows what we have need of even before we ask! Thanks for sharing and I pray that God will do a “suddenly” in your life. Be expecting it!

    To Your Outrageous Success in ALL things,

    Lynn Boatner is Inspiration In Action~Living Boldly and with Passion~

    • Lynn- Yay!!! Thanks so much for the comments, wisdom, and well wishes. I really appreciate your support and for you taking the time to comment! I am so excited to be blogging. Thanks for supporting! God bless you.

  5. Great user-friendly tips! Getting organized at night keeps me from being a total basketcase in the mornings. And if your girls were anything like mine are now, they have opinions on what they want to wear! They know to pick their outfit out at night and get my stamp of approval so there are no meltdowns or squabbles in the morning. Now we need to come up with a celebration. They’ll love that!

  6. marvell myers says:

    Rocky,,you are so wise,,God given,,thanks for giving back.

  7. This is an awesome post! I am so excited about what God is doing and how you will be impacting moms EVERYWHERE!!! Welcome to the blog world! I especially love number 4! My ten year old washes and folds his own clothes. Sometimes we prevent our kids from doing things they could do by failure to delegate! WONDERFUL POST!

    • Thanks sis for commenting! Yes, I’m excited too. I have an upcoming blog that deals more in depth with number 4. It’s needed so we don’t get stressed out! Thanks again for your support!

  8. Great read for us moms who think we have to do it all. And to make matters worse, we display this lifestyle of disorganization to our children so that pattern it as adults. It helped me when I realized this, that children actually learn what they see. I’m glad you posted this; it will help those moms who are overwhelmed gain a sense of control and get it together for 2012 and beyond!

  9. Camille Allen says:

    Hey Rocky, Thanks for this!!! Great tips for a new mom such as my self! LOL…You know all to well how hard it is to prepare your day with a baby! I will definitely plan ahead to keep a stress free life! GREAT JOB! Love Ya!

    • Hi Camille (New Mom!!!)

      Those baby years can be challenging! So much to pack & carry. Thankfully it’s only for a short season. I look forward to helping you make it as stress free as possible through these blogs! Enjoy your blessing. They grow up SUPER fast!

  10. Great job!!! I have not been blessed with children YET, but your tips are quite applicable (and I will tuck them away in a special place until then). I enjoyed reading what you have been impressed to share. Congratulations on this new journey, Rocquelle!

    Unending Blessings to you!!!!

    • Thank you so much! Preparation days are never wasted days, so it’s never to early to store up info! 🙂

      • Beverly Wilson says:

        Thank God for storing up information. I am keeping a six year old every night during the week because mom and dad is on third shift. This has refreshed my memory from raising my 24 year old. I thought I had it made but God had other plans for me. I have to teach this child to pray because she don’t know anything about prayer. We have a schedule of doing the same thing every day, no deviations, it works because it worked previously. Time management is key, the successful day depends on how you manage your time, God’s way. I agree with your strategy, it is true and I agree with every word of it. God Bless and continue to bless others with your experience.

  11. I am so happy I read this! I NEVER read blogs! Even now as I sit to type this my children are “over cooking my grits”. I had to sit and realize I was not delegating things to my children and sticking to my guns and making them do so. I’d just rather not have the fight. I am married, but my husband is in prison, we have a total of 6 kids whom I love dearly, I am in school full time, I am trying to earn an income from home building a business, and add in serving at church, school volunteering, and a host of other things to do for my dad who has become dependent on me. I just pass out at the end of the day. I keep wondering, where am I going wrong?!

    • Tamar- Wow! I’m blessed by you sharing your story. I’m honored this blog could help you sort things out, and hopefully get you some well deserved freedom! Thanks for reading the blog. Hope you stay connected!

  12. I’m another new mom and WOWWWWW, I’m SO GLAD that I came across your blog. Having recently gone back to work, I learned from the first week of chaos that I had to prepare and strategize over the weekends for stress-free early mornings. Now getting myself and my 3 month old ready for daycare and work in the early a.m. is much easier…and our journeys to come will be even more seamless now that I’ve read your blog! I look forward to future posts…I’m tuned in and ready to learn! Thank you!

  13. Mrs. Bonton says:

    Roc,
    This blog hit home for me. I have to do better! I will admit that I got to the point of just opting to stay at home and look at service on the internet and tv rather than going to church! The frustration of getting the kids ready and myself just became too much! I want to get back in service so I will take what you have blogged to heart and put it in action! Thanks Roc

  14. Rocquelle, I am single with no kids and this STILL BLESSED me tremendously. Your words are filled with such wisdom and power. This is an awesome vision. Run with it!

  15. CrownedMom says:

    Yes, yes, yes! Independence starts young! My children are 11 years apart so it was like raising 2 “only child’s” so to speak. Mom has to be playmate as well as all the other Mom duties. When my oldest was barely a toddler I worked at night and spent time with him by day. Since we had opposite. Schedules, when I arrived home in the wee hours I did EXACTLY as mentioned above and set the cereal out and since I also owned one of those dorm refrigerators, I would put that cup of milk in there-just the right size for him. I’d have the TV set on PBS. This small act bought me 2-3 hours of sleep. He would awaken and pretty much be self-sufficient for that time. Of course I had to do the PREP part and train him first. You have to know your child and how much he or she can handle. He knew I was right there and he could call on me if needed but you know what? He never needed to! That was just one of many steps that can be taken. He is now an independent adult handling his business and I couldn’t be more proud of him.

  16. This is SO my life right now! I have two girls, a 9 month old and a 2 year old, and am usually late EVERYWHERE. My husband runs the sound at church and I am on the dance team. This post was so relevant to me I shared it with my husband. Thanks for these simple, yet effective tips and I pray for consistency in following them!

    • TJ I’m so glad this helped you! Do the steps & make adjustments as needed. Even if you don’t nail it the first time keep trying. You’re going to feel so good when you nail it! Be blessed.

  17. I definitely have to plan outfits, etc. the night before or we will NEVER get anywhere even close to the time that we should! Enter into the picture that my son has some limitations and so sometimes he has meltdowns before we get through the door, I breathe sighs of thanks when we are ready and leaving the house ON TIME!

Trackbacks

Leave a Reply to Andrea Cancel reply

*