Marriage, Rings, and Other Things


I think it’s nearly impossible for anyone in my house to surprise me, but my hubby, Merlon Devine, managed to do it effortlessly. After we ate dinner on my birthday (July 1), we reluctantly (so I thought) decided to order a dessert to share. The waiter came out with two plates, and placed the dessert assortment plate in front of me. On it there were three pink ribbons, and each was tying a piece of paper with a word (past, present, future) to a diamond band or ring!







The stereo speaker above our table was playing Merlon’s song he wrote to me, “Let’s Grow Old” from his new CD, Love Divine (you can get it at


Then he presented me with the ring set and asked me to renew our marriage vows for our 20 year anniversary in January. I had NO IDEA about any of it!!! I was blown away…in fact, I still am. What a wonderful surprise. He put a ring on it again!


I am crazy excited about this new ring! My very first wedding ring was quite modest. My husband purchased it from a pawn shop over twenty years ago. It was nice, and I am glad he was smart enough not to go in debt to buy me an expensive ring. I wore it proudly for ten years before getting my first ring upgrade. 

I want to encourage you ladies reading this, not to base the quality of your marriage on the quality of your ring. Carats don’t equal a great marriage! How many celebrities have you seen that had a huge engagement ring and an expensive wedding, only to have a marriage that lasted a few months? Obviously it’s not all about the ring, the dress, the cake, etc. 

My husband and I already knew we wanted to build our marriage on a solid foundation, Christ. We wanted the word of God to be the foundation for  how we treated each other. We have allowed it to be the standard in our marriage. While our marriage has still required work, as all marriages do, it has been a wonderful 19 years so far! Our Christian beliefs have made all the difference in our relationship. Yeah, I know a few non-Christian people that seem to have a good relationship from the outside. I also know some devout Christians that were not able to stay married for various reasons. I am not condemning either of the relationships I just described. I can only tell you what we have decided, and what has worked for us. Again, being a Christian isn’t all there is to having a great marriage. You have to have two people that are committed to do the work to maintain the union. Here are a few things that have helped us stay the course:

  • We listen to teachings on marriage and apply them to our lives (I highly recommend Marriage Made EZ teachings by Drs. Mike and Deedee Freeman. They keep it REAL and practical.) 
  • We attend marriage related events on a regular basis.
  • We talk to each other frequently (like two teenagers in love).
  • We communicate our issues and come to a resolution (easier said than done, but doable and so worth it).
  • We read books about marriage.
  • We go on dates often, during the daytime or nighttime. 
  • We laugh together often. 
  • We show affection to one another privately and publicly.
  • We attend church together and discuss what we learned from the service.

Here’s something from Pintrest that I thought would be good to share as well. 


I could go on and on, but I think you get what I am saying. There is work involved in maintaining the marriage, just as there is in maintaining anything.



Thanks for taking the time to read this blog. I pray it has been a blessing to you in some way or another. I always love to hear from you, so leave your comments on this blog please! 🙂






  1. Nikki Louden says:

    Beautiful!!!! Enjoyed reading & thanks for sharing your beautiful amazing blessed life & family with us. You all have been blessed to be a blessing & you truly have been.

  2. Such a Great Read. ….I got teary. Such a blessing… SO SWEET! !! My husband upgraded me to a simple band, something I asked him for and I’m Content. I’ve learned so much being married, and growth helped me to appreciate the finer things in life… my husband of 13 years! Keep up the good work and thanks for sharing. I went h.s. with Merlon and he was an up standing guy twenty years ago. So, I can imagine growth. Enjoy your new ring!

    • Yasha,

      Thank you so much! Sounds like you have indeed learned a lot about marriage and what to value. I appreciate you taking the time to comment. I figured Merlon was always a great guy. 🙂 Thanks again!

  3. Very inspirational!

  4. The ring don’t me a thing. Lol Just kidding! thanks for being transparent as always. Go Merlon, you did that!

  5. Yolanda Flie says:

    Always a good word R ocquelle. Thank you for the encouragement and reminders!

  6. Paula Mack says:

    <3 one of the most beautiful love filled blessings that I had the pleasure of reading in a very long time, this was very beautiful and so inspiring, not to mention filled with so much truth about marriages how they last and or fail, I love the love her, my God continue to bless you both as well as your family and may heaven continue to shine upon you and everything you put your hands, minds as well as hearts to <3 BE BLESSED!!!

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